You were an old flame guttering,
sputtering with the lie of life.
Closer to extinction you lived,
armchair convictions condensed to
badge the sleeve of your hair shirt.
You imagined me a mirror
fit for moulding to your image.
But I proved more enigmatic
than Leonardo's lady, my length
cramping, hampered by your frame.
What saw you last when the rattle
stuck fast, final, in your black craw
and then fluttered from your mute mouth?
A gilded moth trapped, flickering
in swirling wake of summer skirt.
I was good and angry when I wrote this one - it's about an ex who has died, and I suppose a bit of me being angry for the person that he used to be.
Don't get me wrong, I was very sorry to hear when he died, and am sure that he had changed into someone else as we all do as we grow older. This is more of a revisiting of the time before, when I knew him and an outpouring of all things I wanted to say but hadn't the wit for at the time.
Who'd be 21 again? *sigh*
2 comments:
Pretty powerful piece, it must have been simmering away for a long time. Funny how someone dying can bring out a whole range of emotions, including being good and angry that you never got to tell them how you felt.
I agree I wouldn't go back to being 21 again, unless I could take all of my experiences with them, then the world would have to look out!
I like the mirror and moulding part, I think that's true of many relationship, we think we'll take them on as they are and fix them up into something more acceptable later, or that we'll rescue them from themselves -always a big mistake.
21, no way. I wouldn't mind a crack at 41 again, though...
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